Aman 12:00:00 AM 15 Feb, 2017

When your phone battery is at 1%

and you are running to the phone charger like-.
.
"Mere saath reh bhaai..

aankhe band mat karna..

tujhe main kuch nhi hone dunga!"

Related to this Post:

#16291 Happy

12:00:00 AM 18 Mar, 2017

Law of queue: If you change queues, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now.

Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged one.

Law of Mechanical Repair: after your hands become coated with grease, yr nose will begin to itch.

Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

Bath THEOREM: When the body is immersed in water, the telephone rings.

LAW OF ENCOUNTERS: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

LAW of the RESULT: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will!

LAW OF BIOMECHANICS: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

THEATRE RULE: People with the seats at the furthest from the aisle arrive last.

LAW OF COFFEE: As soon as you sit down for a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

#16709 Happy

12:00:00 AM 19 Mar, 2017

A guy goes down for breakfast and it is quite obvious that his wife has the hump with him. He asks what is the matter. She replies, "Last night you were talking in your sleep and I want to know who Linda is?" Thinking quickly on his feet he tells her that Linda was 'Lucky Linda' and was actually a name of a horse that he bet on that day and won �40. She seemed quite happy with the explanation and he went off to work. When he got home that night, his wife had the hump with him again. Asking her what the matter was now, she replied "Your horse phoned."

#17385 Happy

12:00:00 AM 22 Mar, 2017

Terms to Know - Funny Jokes
Terms to Know

TRAFFIC LIGHT � Apparatus that automatically turns red when your car approaches.

DIVORCE � Postgraduate in School of Love.

PIONEER � Early American who was lucky enough to find his way out of the woods.

PEOPLE � Some make things happen, some watch things happen, and the majority has no idea what's happened.

SWIMMING POOL � A mob of people with water in it.

SELF-CONTROL � The ability to eat only one peanut.

SALESMAN � Man with ability to convince wife she'd look fat in mink.

CANNIBAL � Person who likes to see other people stewed.

EGOCENTRIC � A person who believes he is everything you know you are.

FOREIGN FILM � Any movie shown in Texas theater that isn't a western.

OPTIMIST � Girl who regards a bulge as a curve.

MAGAZINE � Bunch of printed pages that tell you what's coming in the next issue.

COLLEGE � The four-year period when parents are permitted access to the telephone.

EMERGENCY NUMBERS � Police station, fire department and places that deliver.

OPERA � When a guy gets stabbed in the back and instead of bleeding he sings.

BUFFET � A French word that means "Get up and get it yourself."

BABY-SITTER � A teen-ager who must behave like an adult so that the adults who are out can behave like teen-agers.

TATTOO � Permanent proof of temporary insanity.

#17475 Happy

12:00:00 AM 22 Mar, 2017

Yo mama feet are so big her shoes have to have license plates!

Yo mama aint so bad...she would give you the hair off of her back!

Yo mama lips so big, Chap Stick had to invent a spray.

It took Yo mama 10 tries to get her drivers license, she couldnt get used to the front seat!

Yo mama hips are so big, people set their drinks on them.

Yo mama hair so nappy she has to take Tylenol just to comb it.

Yo mama so clumsy she got tangled up in a cordless phone.

Yo mama so wrinkled, she has to screw her hat on.

Yo mama twice the man you are.

Yo mama cross-eyed and watches TV in stereo.

Yo mama is missing a finger and can't count past nine.

Yo mama arms are so short, she has to tilt her head to scratch her ear.

Yo mama middle name is Rambo.

Yo mama in a wheelchair and says, "You ain't gonna puch me 'round no more."

Yo mama rouchy, the McDonalds she works in doesn't even serve Happy Meals.

Yo mama so stupid was born on Independence Day and can't remember her birthday.

Yo mama mouth so big, she speaks in surround sound.

Yo mama gums are so black she spits Yoo-hoo.

Yo mama breath smell so bad when she yawns her teeth duck.

I saw your mama at the freak show petting the world's largest turtle.

I saw your mama kicking a can down the street. I asked her what she was doing, and she said "Moving."

Yo mama teeth are so rotten, when she smiles they look like dice.