TIPU Bareilly@99 12:00:00 AM 13 Feb, 2017

girl : me tumhe apna dil nahi de sakti.. smile.png
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me : main. itni upar ki soch bhi nahi raha
hu

Related to this Post:

#34 ADMIN

06:09:06 PM 11 Feb, 2016

जिंदगी बदलने वाली कहानियां=>यहाँ क्लिक करें
Home > Aam Aadmi Party Jokes > girl friend boy friend jokes > मुझे ‘आप’ पसंद है लेकिन…Aam Aadmi Jokes
मुझे ‘आप’ पसंद है लेकिन…Aam Aadmi Jokes

बंटी बबली से बहुत प्यार करता था
बंटी ने सोचा कि आज अपने दिल की बात कह ही देता हूँ

बंटी – मुझे एक बात कहनी है

बबली – क्या ?

बंटी – मुझे ‘आप’ पसंद है
बबली – लेकिन मुझे तो ‘भाजपा’ पसंद है

हो गया ना दिमाग का दही :) :)

#814 ADMIN

05:30:00 AM 01 Jan, 1970

1. National Sister - Mamta Banerjee
___________________________
2. National Girlfriend - Sunny Leone
___________________________
3. National Tension - Salman Khan's Marriage
___________________________
4. National Bachelor - Rahul Gandhi
___________________________
5. National Dehshat - Sequel of Ra.One
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6. National food - Kasam
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7. National Struggler - Abhishek Bachchan
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8. National Judge - Archana Puran Singh
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9. National Mom - Jaya Lalita
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10. National Jamaai - Robert Vadra
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11. National Book - Face Book
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12. National Robot -Manmohan Singh
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13. National Bank - Swiss Bank
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14. National God - Sachin Tendulkar
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15. National Show - Comedy Nights with Kapil
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16. National Tiger - Narendra Modi
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17: National Time Pass :
Whatsapp
___________________________
Amul - The taste of India

Babool - The paste of India

Rahul Gandhi - The waste of India
___________________________
Modi - The best of India

Sonia - The guest of India
__________________________
😀😀😀😀😀😀
Market mein naya hai, aage frwd karo...

#2277 ADMIN

05:30:00 AM 01 Jan, 1970

*Few naughty but true facts*
____________________

*Naked truth*
We all love to spend lots of money buying new clothes...
but we never realise that the best moments in life are enjoyed without clothes....!
____________________

*Alteration*
Having a cold drink on hot day with few friends is nice, but having a hot friend on a cold night after a few drinks - PRICELESS....!
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*Breaking news:* Condoms don't guarantee safe sex anymore!
A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot dead by the woman's husband...!!
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*Choice*
Arguing over a girls breast size is like choosing between Kingfisher, Fosters, Carlsberg & Budweiser.
Men may state their preferences, but will grab whatever is available....!!
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*Anti-Gravity situation*
Why Did Newton Commit Suicide....?
Because He Saw A Complete Naked Girl, And Observed Something Going Up In His Pant, Against His Own Laws of Gravity...!!
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*Meat ball*
Why Are Vegetarian Women Silent During Sex....?
They Are In State Of Shock That A Piece Of Meat Can Give So Much Pleasure...!!
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*Location of body parts*
Why are breasts located in the upper half of a woman's body?
A: Because, milk should be kept away from the pussy
____________________

*DEFINITION OF BLOWJOB*
A blowjob is the only job in the world that can't be included in your
resume despite years of experience and a number of references!
____________________

*BALLS THEORY*
If you have two balls between your legs it means u r man.
If you have four, it does not mean that u r superman....
U must've guessed by now that someone's taking your ass
____________________

*EXPLANATION*
Bio teacher: Girls, the size of a penis should be 2.5 inches for successful penetration.
Girl: Ma'am, how about 9 inches?
Teacher: I was talking of necessity not luxury.
____________________

*VIAGRA*
All medicines have Side effects, only VIAGRA has Front effect.
____________________

*BURNING LOVE*
Q: What is the definition of "burning love"?
A: It's when at night you reach out for the Vaseline gel and pick up Tiger balm by mistake

#2445 ADMIN

05:30:00 AM 01 Jan, 1970

Technical Support Jokes in Hindi
एक महिला ने .. "IT TECHNICAL Support" ..
को PHONE किया।
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महिला---"मुझे HUSBAND PROGRAM में दिक्कत आ रही है। "
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Technical Support---" कब से है यह दिक्कत...?"
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महिला---" देखिए, पिछले साल मैंने अपने BOYFRIEND को UPDATE कर HUSBAND INSTALL किया था।
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उसके बाद से ही पूरा SYSTEM SLOW हो गया है।
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खासतौर पर ‘FLOWER’ और ‘JEWELLERY’ APPLICATION ने काम करना बंद कर दिया है।
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ये Apps ‘BOYFRIEND' में अच्छी चलती थीं।
इसके अलावा HUSBAND ने ‘ROMANCE' Program भी UNINSTALL कर दिया है।
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इसकी जगह ‘NEWS', ‘MONEY' और ‘CRICKET' जैसे फालतू Program INSTALL हो गए हैं।
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अब मैं इसे कैसे सुधारूँ ...???
Technical Support---" जी Madam, ‘HUSBAND Install करने के बाद ऐसी समस्या होती रहती है।
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सबसे पहले इस बात का ध्यान रखें कि ‘BOYFRIEND' एक ENTERTAINMENT DEMO PACKAGE था,
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जबकि ‘HUSBAND LIFETIME OPERATING SYSTEM है।
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इसे सुधारने के लिए ‘आँसू Program Download करें।
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इससे ‘JEWELLERY' और ‘FLOWERS' Application अपने आप Install हो जाएँगे।

Warning:
हालांकि याद रखें, आँसू ज्यादा इस्तेमाल करने पर ‘HUSBAND
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' हमेशा के लिए ‘SILENCE’ या ‘BEER' wisky Mode पर चला जाएगा।
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साथ ही ‘HUSBAND' के Original Package को Disturb न करें।
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ऐंसा करने पर नया VIRUS ‘GIRLFRIEND'
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Download हो जाता है।
इसके अलावा ‘BOYFRIEND' को दोबारा INSTALL करने की कोशिश भी न करें।
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ऐसा करने पर आपका LIFE OPERATING SYSTEM Crash हो जाएगा। "

#5412 TIPU

12:00:00 AM 11 Feb, 2017

boy : औरते अपनी ऊमर नही बताती क्यु

girl : बता भी दें तो कोई गधा यकीन नही करता

boy : आपकीage

me : 22

boy : मै नही मानता

me: पहले ही कहा था कि कोई गधा यकीन नही करता..

#5587 Aman

12:00:00 AM 12 Feb, 2017

most confusing double meaning joke..

girl: आज ऑफिस जाते ही बॉस मुझपे चढ गया!

friend : क्यूँ ???

girl: मैं "लेट गयी" थी.

#5754 Aman

12:00:00 AM 12 Feb, 2017

me: ये कैसी चाय बनायी है तुमने , अजीब सा स्वाद है इसका !

girlfriend: ये कॉफ़ी है साले गरीब !

me: ओह

#6225 Aman

12:00:00 AM 13 Feb, 2017

girl : main pataka hu pataka.

me : *sets her on fire*

#6463 TIPU

12:00:00 AM 13 Feb, 2017

girl : tera phone humesha charge

kaise rehta hain...
:
boy : main single hu behan

#6488 TIPU

12:00:00 AM 13 Feb, 2017

girl : where is my birthday
gift?
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boy : road pe red colour ki
car dekh rahi
ho?
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girl khushi se : wow.
..
..
boy : same colour ki nail-
polish tere liye
laya hoon..